andrew_jorgensen ([personal profile] andrew_jorgensen) wrote2003-10-27 05:24 pm

Fish with feet

My mother, who last week was installed as the new pastor of the First Presbyterian Church of Nowheresville, Michigan, just sent me this email:
As I listen to Diane Rheme talk about the Florida case, I would like to tell you my wishes. I do not want to be kep alive if I am in a persistent vegatative state is. After I reach 80 or so, I would like to die naturally. If I break my neck I do not want to be put in a halo. One of my parishioners who is over 90 broke her neck and is in a halo. It looks terribly painful.
To which I responded, "In that case, you really picked the wrong line of work. You should have stayed a lawyer – they never get put into haloes." Not that my mother, in her heretical Zen Presbyterianism, puts much stock in the concept of an afterlife -- or in many of the other tropes of Conservative Christianity. She really wants to get one of those Darwin Fish for her car, an act that might be seen as antagonistic to community values, judging from the number of Jesus Fish I saw affixed to cars on the Ohio and Indiana Turpikes when I drove up to visit her. (It should be noted that I was down with the Jesus Fish long before it sold out and went mainstream: it was an important symbol to Philip K. Dick, and as a crossword devotee, I love it just for its simplicity as an acrostic.)

However, if the Darwin Fish is antagonistic, those antagonised by it give as good as they get. Before I had even left the East side of Cleveland, I passed a car with the bumper sticker:


I felt a little antagonised myself, because I first thought that this was referring to the old canard that Darwin had renounced evolution on his deathbed, a canard that even creationists have abandoned. (The one story of a noted agnostic scientist undergoing a deathbed conversion to Christianity which is well documented is that of John Von Neumann, who was born into Judaism and spent most of his life as an atheist, but did in fact convert to Catholicism -- for the second time in his life -- while he lay dying in Walter Reed Hospital. Of course, Von Neumann was instrumental in the invention of game theory, and he may have just been taking Pascal's Wager.) After a moment of reflection, I decided that the bumper sticker was merely saying that Darwin, now that he is burning in Hell, has probably reconsidered, which is Argument No. 39 of the 519 Arguments for the Existence of God, the Argument From Post-Death Experience:
  1. Person X died an atheist.
  2. He now realizes his mistake.
  3. Therefore, God exists.
In any case, while I like both the Jesus Fish and the Darwin Fish, I'm a little disappointed in some of the other options. Frankly, it's not enough for me just to say whether or not I accept evolution, I want the ability to say which of the strains of modern evolutionary theory ("modified descendants," if you will) I favor, all from the comfort of my driver's seat. For example, were I too favor a gradualistic view of evolution, I could paste the following to my bumper:


(Do note that I could stick an outline of an acacia tree in front of each fish and have a pretty good iconographic reduction of Lamarckianism.)

On the other hand, were I instead a subscriber to the theory of punctuated equilibrium, I could use this bumper sticker:


Though, as this representation still seems to buy into an implied progressive view of evolution, it's not the best description of Gouldianism. And while I'm misrepresenting the big names in popular evolutionary writing, I'll commit a false synecdoche and generalize Richard Dawkins's ascription of selfishness to genes to the organism as a whole:

I'm a little confused by adaptionism, and I'm a little confused by my own illustration of adaptionism.

I'm not sure whether the feet of the fish evolved as an adaption to the ecological niche provided by the abundance of soccer balls, or whether the soccer balls evolved in response to the presence of feet. It's probably co-evolution.

I like cladistics, I really do. It's a nifty little classification scheme. However, one might not be able to tell that I like it from:

That graphic demonstrates how I can't seem to break free from the progressivist view. It also shows a little break from actual physiology: tetrapods remain tetrapods, and unlike dragons, do not grow a set of true wings without repurposing another pair of limbs. I suppose my drawing skills are poor enough that I could get away with saying that that last fish has grown not wings but instead a complex back plate, in the manner of Stegosaurus, probably for the purpose of heat distribution.

Finally, we have what I consider an entirely accurate summation of Evolutionary Psychology:



Ahh, car fenders. They're the new Lyceum, I tell you!

Re: Why I will never have one of those Darwin fish on my car

[identity profile] dherblay.livejournal.com 2003-10-27 10:11 pm (UTC)(link)
I need to get over my three-alarm headache before I can write you a proper response, but let me offer an outline here. I agree that observation of the facts which would lead one to think that organisms evolved predate Darwin, which is why his theory is more properly called "the theory of descent with modification by means of natural (and sexual) selection." I am not so sure that the natural selection part of the theory is unfalsifiable (or almost so). I will have to think about that. The notion of "survival of the fittest" to which you refer does contain some amount of tautology; however, I'm not certain that Darwin has to take much of the credit or the blame for "survival of the fittest" -- I think it's someone else's term. In any case, natural selection should not imply any exterior standard of fitness (or for that matter that nature has any standards of discernment at all).

I do not worship science. I worship LJ comments and those who leave them.

Re: Why I will never have one of those Darwin fish on my car

(Anonymous) 2003-10-28 07:51 am (UTC)(link)
"Survival of the fittest" is indeed not Darwin's term. It comes from Herbert Spencer, who had written a number of evolution-like pieces in the decade before the publication of the first edition of Darwin's Origin of Species (1859). The idea of a "struggle for existence" was very much "in the air" and both men were influenced by Malthus. Spencer went on to write any number of works that purported to be based on evolution, and he was at one point wildly influential.

In later editions of the "Origin," Darwin specifically said that his principle of descent with modification by means of natural selection could accurately be described by the term "survival of the fittest", and gave Spencer credit for the term.

RAS
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"Survival of those who survive"

[identity profile] masqthephlsphr.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 09:07 am (UTC)(link)
Yep, that explains a lot.

Re: Why I will never have one of those Darwin fish on my car

[identity profile] dherblay.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 03:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, that's it exactly. It reminds me that Gould, at least, suggested that Darwin's best statement of his theory came in the first edition, before he included the "improvements."

On a different subject, do you mind if I ask how you found this? And, now that you've followed us home, can we keep you?

Too cute!

[identity profile] hermionesviolin.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 04:06 pm (UTC)(link)
RAS is my father. I know [livejournal.com profile] scrollgirl on LJ and happened to see this entry when i was checking out friendsfriends when i should have been doing my homework. volokh.com had been discussing bumper stickers and the Darwin fish, so i sent the link along to my dad.

-Elizabeth

P.S. I heart your UserInfo quote.

Re: Too cute!

[identity profile] dherblay.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 04:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow! I feel honored to have people recommending me to family. I feel like a list of 600 blonde jokes! Seriously, be forewarned that if you send your father over here any more, I'm going to adopt him! And thanks for the pimpage (http://www.livejournal.com/users/hermionesviolin/268829/)!

I probably should have creditted that Volokh post, and the Chris Mooney post (http://www.chriscmooney.com/blog.asp#379) which led me there.

Friendsfriends is the most marvelous thing. I've been using it to follow the saga of whether or not you'd get to write the column you'd want. As both a former college newspaper columnist and someone interested in genetics, it tweaked my interest. Though I never had to get an editor to preapprove my subject choices!

[livejournal.com profile] masqthephlsphr gets all the credit for the UserInfo quote.

Thank you for stopping by! Do come again!

Re: Too cute!

[identity profile] hermionesviolin.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
1) Blogs = HOTT!

2) Friendsfriends is so very marvelous. And aw, i have a following! *blushes* Okay, so only for one topic, but still. I seem to have a small fanclub on LJ, which is all flavors of weird, but i bask. (And so many of my friends have brilliant people on their lists whom i semi-stalk, so it's generally a happy land of intelligence and mutual admiration.)

3) Well yes i know you didn't write the quote, but reading it i thought "That's my kind of person!" It also reminded me of myself :) (Also, it occurs to me that i may be in your area over the winter holiday.)

Re: Spurious Stephenism

[identity profile] angeyja.livejournal.com 2003-10-30 02:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Excellence is a range of differences, not a spot.

--Stephen J Gould, Full House
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LJ comments are big fun!

[identity profile] masqthephlsphr.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 09:00 am (UTC)(link)
Which explains why I get so little done at work these days. : )
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On the unfalsifiability thing

[identity profile] masqthephlsphr.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 09:06 am (UTC)(link)
I used to teach philosophy of biology, and one of the things we would cover are the standards of evidence in evolutionary biology. Some critics of Adaptationist models charge that these scientists' main criteria for the soundness of a theory to explain the evolution of a species is that they can come up with some "plausible story" about why that species' ancestors were more fit than their competitors.

If the "plausible story" criterion is indeed the way they judge acceptable theories, they open themselves up to all sorts of speculation, biases, etc, especially when the traits they are talking about are behavioral (as opposed to strictly physiological).

Re: On the unfalsifiability thing

[identity profile] dherblay.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 10:08 am (UTC)(link)
I've slept on it, gotten rid of my headache, and decided that it's easier for me to just reject Popper than it is for me to craft a thoughtful response. I'm stuck in little language loops of what falsifiability means. Perhaps I need coffee, or just to be smarter.

The "Just So" story critique of adaptionism, especially when it comes to sociobiology, was one of Gould's favorites, and is certainly on the mark with much of the hyperadaptionism out there.
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Rejecting Popper

[identity profile] masqthephlsphr.livejournal.com 2003-10-28 11:18 am (UTC)(link)
Well, Popper's main sin was being a philosopher. Trying to find "the" model of ideal scientific reasoning when there are in fact a gazillion of them in that messy thing called real life.

And trying to make his model of scientific reasoning precise and elegant, without realizing that the simpler the explanation, the less it explains in that messy thing called real life.